why do we have to say goodbye

The B! tch Replies:
Why include words like goodbye when those precious milliseconds could be filled with an exploding semi, or helicopter chase or? Goodbye is a waste. Americans don t want goodbye. We want action! And! And animals! Goodbye is just one of those words that has been deemed inefficient by filmmakers. Hello is pretty rare, too, although, annoyingly, Lost is keeping the word hey alive and well. ( Do not take a shot of tequila every time you hear say hey on Lost, or you. Will. Die. ) Why such a lack of civility on TV and in the movies? Like I said: We want action! Don t take my word for it. Here s input from Josh Olson, a real, live, honest-to-baby-Jesus working screenwriter who even got an Oscar nomination for his work on the movie A History of Violence. He says, It s possible that some filmmakers think it slows down the action if characters say things like, hello, goodbye and Sorry, I have to commandeer your car for the sake of homeland security. Besides, he adds, how come movie and TV characters never close the door when they enter the room?


Story flow, child, story flow. Goodbye sounds natural in real life, but on celluloid, to our sophisticated moviegoing ears, it sounds awkward and unnecessary. And amateurish, adds Michele Alexander, a screenwriter and coauthor of the book, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, which later became a movie with and (Alexander and cowriter Jeannie Long have two more 10 Days books coming out in the next week or so. Hudson may wither and die before she can film all these. ) Every word in your script should mean something and move the story along, Alexander explains. Right. Plus, if Jack Bauer slowed down long enough to say goodbye to someone on the phone, he would get shot by the Chinese or blown up by the CIA. Every rogue agent worth his cyanide knows that. Why are celebs doing infomercials? free on iTunes, or listen on that fancy XM or Sirius radio of yours. With all the heartache it causes, why do some people have so much trouble letting go of their grief? In an ironic twist, new research shows that the brain's pleasure center may be to blame.


Most people, when confronted with the death of a loved one, mourn intensely for a few weeks or months and then gradually manage to move on. A small percentage, however, become debilitated by the loss and can't resume their normal lives; they experience what psychologists call complicated grief. Functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI), which measures blood flow to various parts of the brain, has shown that grief activates regions of the brain associated with processing pain. However, no study had yet observed what happens in the brain during complicated grief. In the new work, which will be published in the 15 August issue of NeuroImage, researchers led by clinical psychologist Mary-Frances O'Connor of the University of California, Los Angeles, looked at 23 women who had lost a mother or sister to breast cancer within the past 5 years. Based on a clinical assessment, the researchers divided the women into complicated and noncomplicated grievers.


They then showed the women a series of 60 pictures that paired a photo of a stranger or the deceased loved one with either a grief-related word (e. g. , cancer) or a similar-looking but emotionally neutral word (e. g. , ginger). The purpose of the words was to make the images of relatives seem fresh, even if the women had already viewed them several times on their own. As expected, fMRI revealed strong activity in pain-processing areas of the brain when the women saw photos of their relatives or grief-related words. No such effect appeared when subjects saw neutral words or photos of strangers. The surprise came when women diagnosed with complicated grief looked at a picture of their relative or a grief-related word: In addition to activity in pain-processing areas of the brain, these women showed activity in the nucleus accumbens, a region of the brain linked to pleasure and reward. The findings could mean that the brains of women with complicated grief have not properly adjusted to the fact that their loved ones are gone, O'Connor speculates.


When humans become attached to someone, they derive pleasure from the attachment, and their nucleus accumbens activate, she notes. And because that area is also active when women with complicated grief see reminders of a dead relative, it may signal that these women have a harder time accepting the death of a loved one than noncomplicated grievers do. At the very least, says O'Connor, scientists may now have a clinical marker that can help them distinguish among women with complicated and noncomplicated grief. George Bonanno, a clinical psychologist at Columbia University who also studies grief and trauma, says the study provides an avenue to explore and better treat complicated grief, perhaps via drugs that target the nucleus accumbens. He cautions that a lot of experimental research still needs to be done to properly investigate the mechanisms of grief, because, he says, "it's one of the most common events that we'll have to cope with, and yet it's very poorly understood. "

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