why do we argue so much quotes
In a short time a group of commissioners arrived to begin organization of a new Indian agency in the valley. One of them mentioned the advantages of schools for JosephÁs people. Joseph replied that the Nez Percös did not want the white manÁs schools. ÁWhy do you not want schools? Á the commissioner asked. ÁThey will teach us to have churches,Á Joseph answered. ÁDo you not want churches? Á ÁNo, we do not want churches. Á ÁWhy do you not want churches? Á ÁThey will teach us to quarrel about God,Á Joseph said. ÁWe do not want to learn that. We may quarrel with men sometimes about things on this earth, but we never quarrel about God. We do not want to learn that.
As a society, we tend to be losing our ability to debate without getting angry. Instead, we find ourselves drawing lines in the sand around our beliefs, and we forget to listen to the other side of the story. An argument begins when there is a disagreement that has the promise of compromise. Most arguments these days are a result of two people trying to prove how right they are. There is no compromise.
And instead, relationships are damaged, and no one is winning anything. There is no point in having creative ideas and innovative thought when we canÁt convince someone else to listen so we can persuade them to consider an alternative point of view. To have a good and fair argument, we must remain calm, respectful and committed to listening and hearing our opponentÁs point of view. When we start there, we have a much better chance of a fair fight. If our opponent doesnÁt share the same commitment to productive arguing, it is probably wise to consider walking away. Walk away from any argument when the opponent chooses not to listen respectfully or when they exhibit anger, frustration or become verbally abusive. There is no ÁwinningÁ an argument when the situation isn t based on respectful communication. The other thing to remember is winning doesnÁt come from changing someoneÁs mind; it comes from presenting a logical, factual and meaningful argument to support your point of view. ItÁs hard to remember to take the high road in an argument, especially when we want other people to understand and validate our point of view.
But take the high road we must. And something as simple as a quote can remind us not to engage in an argument that isnÁt going anywhere. When we can begin to recognize the signs, we can make better choices and stop the argument before it gets out of hand. ÁDon t raise your voice, improve your argument. ~ Desmond Tutu ÁThe silence is the worst part of any fight, because it s made up of all the things we wish we could say, if only we had the guts. Á ~ Pete Wentz, Gray ÁWouldn t you like to have a magic phrase that would stop arguments, eliminate ill feeling, create good will, and make the other person listen attentively? Yes? All right. Here it is: I don t blame you one iota for feeling as you do. If I were you I would undoubtedly feel just as you do. ~ Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People ÁIf men would consider not so much wherein they differ, as wherein they agree, there would be far less of uncharitableness and angry feeling. Á ~ Joseph Addison ÁA lot of arguments can be avoided if we simply stop and think about our response before we say it.
Á ~ Charles Harper ÁThe moment we want to believe something, we suddenly see all the arguments for it, and become blind to the arguments against it. Á ~ George Bernard Shaw ÁArguments, like men are often pretenders. Á ~ Plato ÁThe aim of argument, or of discussion, should not be victory, but progress. Á ~ Joseph Joubert ÁNo one can persuade another to change. Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be opened from the inside. We cannot open the gate of another, either by argument or emotional appeal. Á ~ Marilyn Ferguson ÁGreat leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution everybody can understand. Á ~ Colin Powell ÁInsults are the arguments employed by those who are in the wrong. Á ~ Jean-Jacques Rousseau ÁDiscussion is an exchange of knowledge; an argument an exchange of ignorance. Á ~ Robert Quillen ÁBe able to defend your arguments in a rational way. Otherwise, all you have is an opinion.
Á ~ Marilyn vos Savant ÁA lot of good arguments are spoiled by some fool who knows what he is talking about. Á ~ Miguel de Unamuno ÁNeither irony or sarcasm is argument. Á ~ Samuel Butler ÁPeople s minds are changed through observation and not through argument. Á ~ Will Rogers ÁMen are apt to mistake the strength of their feeling for the strength of their argument. The heated mind resents the chill touch and relentless scrutiny of logic. Á ~ William E. Gladstone ÁDon t take the wrong side of an argument just because your opponent has taken the right side. Á ~ Baltasar Gracian ÁI passionately believe that s it s not just what you say that counts, it s also how you say it that the success of your argument critically depends on your manner of presenting it. Á ~ Alain de Botton ÁAnyone who conducts an argument by appealing to authority is not using his intelligence; he is just using his memory. Á ~ Leonardo da Vinci ÁWhy do people always assume that volume will succeed when logic wonÁt? Á ~ L. J. Smith, Nightfall
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