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why do victims stay in domestic violence relationships

Why do Abuse Victims Stay? You re telling me that your
husband beat you up. I would never put up with that abuse. Why don t
you just leave him. We often put ourselves in the place of the victims and imagine
ourselves leaving at the first signs of abuse. But breaking free of abuse
is not simply a matter of walking out the door. Leaving
is a process. It can be difficult for many people to understand why a person would
stay in an abusive relationship. But there are many reasons. Strong
emotional and psychological forces keep the victim tied to the abuser.


Sometimes situational realities like a lack of money keep the victim
from leaving. The reasons for staying vary from one victim to the next,
and they usually involve several factors. Emotional reasons for staying feeling helpless, hopeless and trapped
Situational reasons for staying fear of emotional damage to the children over the loss of a parent, even if that parent is abusive lack of information regarding Personality changes, like low self-esteem in someone who was always confident Skipping out on work, school, or social outings for no clear reason Wearing clothes that donБt fit the season, like long sleeves in summer to cover Are the Signs Different for Men?


TheyБre often the same. And thatБs true whether the abusive partner is a woman or another man. It may be emotional or verbal, like taking away keys, medicines, or other essentials. Or things like constantly putting you down in public or on social media. And, it can be physical. To make up for differences in strength, abusive partners may try to attack you in your, by surprise, or with weapons and other objects.


They may also abuse your children or pets. Are the Signs Different for the LGBTQ Community? Again, thereБs a lot in common, but the abuse may also target or gender identity. Your abuser may: Make excuses for abuse, like itБs just how men are or that you wanted it to happen Threaten to out you to family, friends, and others First, know that you deserve better and that this isnБt your fault. If youБre in an emergency, call 911. It can be hard to decide whether to stay or leave. ThatБs why it may help to start with a call to the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (1-800-799-7233).


Call from a friendБs house or somewhere else where you feel safe. You can also turn to friends, family, neighbors, your doctor, or your spiritual community. Hide a set of car keys. Pack a bag with keys, extra clothes, important papers, money, and medicines. You might keep it at a friendБs house. Have a plan for calling the police in an emergency. You might have a code word so your kids, family, friends, or co-workers know youБre in danger. Know where youБll go and how youБll get there.

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